We are never on the same page....

It has been more than a month since I closed a chapter of my life and came home. A lot of other people did the same. And I thought we are all on the same page. We were being part of the "transformation phase". And I thought we will together cross the bridges. Some did cross the bridges and some took other turns down the road. And I have realized now, we are never on the same page. And how does that make me feel? I don't really know. It's like you are standing on the bank of a river, waiting for your ferry, but you realize you missed the last one that went across. And you find your friends on the other side of the river, waving at you. You are happy to see them but a part of you wishes you were there by their side instead of where you are now. The sun sets, your friends walk away from the bank off to their destinations, and you try walking back home or someplace that brings peace to your mind. 

I don't know if what I am currently feeling is a human feeling already acknowledged or is it just my exemplified anxiety and exhausted hopes that makes me vent these feelings out on this page. 

Recently, I was preparing for an exam where I had to study about plants. There i read something termed as "photo period". The authors of the book wrote that even though photoperiodism was thought of as a light dependent response of plants in the form of developmental changes, it wasn't the length of the day that mattered. What really made one flowering plant different from other was the period of night or darkness it needed before it could bloom. Suddenly at that moment I realized nature's rules never change. The conditions that serve as factors of importance in flowering event of a plant is the same as our growth and development. It is not how many easy work hours you experienced that decide how much you learned. The judge is always the tough times. You never learn an experiment or an application, if you haven't aced your troubleshooting skills. How do you know the level of your patience, if you haven't really been on the wait-list for a long long time? So what if some people got the ferry and reached the other side, if you really wish to go on the other side, you might as well work it out. Don't just sigh about the chances you lost, don't crush your dreams as you hold them tight as you sleep, you need to get your feet ahead. Move your feet and take a step. You might not have the strength to take a leap, but you can still breathe. To keep yourself floating and to save yourself from hitting the bottom of the river, you need to keep paddling your feet. A ferry might not come for you, but if you really wish to be on the other side, what's the last thing you can do? Swim across may be? Darkness might scare you, or the water inhabitants might not be welcoming, but jumping into that river, taking the risks shall be much better than going home and letting your tears lull you to sleep as you sigh with all the breathe you have inside you. You need to take the risk. You need to put your hopes, and anxiety out there and keep working. The result might not be quick but as long as you are staying afloat, you shall survive your battle. Nature shall select you among the people who gave up their battles.

A week back I was still fighting the tears and thinking hard if there is someone really up there who is listening, who will just hold my hand and drag me out of this mess. But then I realized, everyone of us is buried in a heap. May be one part of their life has crossed the river, but the other is still stuck under the heap at the bank of the river. God might keep us afloat while we are in the river, but that can happen only when we get the heap off us, lose burden of negativity, believe and take the leap of faith and jump into the river...and keep paddling. You shall live. You shall reach the other bank, drenched in experiences but you will cross the river. 

So may be we are all not on the same page but we are all part of the book ruled by Mother nature. Every flower needs a specific number of dark hours, that pushes them to grow as they step out into the world to taste the light. Take a sip of the courage you have been storing for a long time and get through the days, one day at a time. Keep your head help up, your crowns need to stay at the right place. :)